Dear Jessie, How Can I Help My Child Overcome Anxiety Before School?
- Jessie Maris
- Mar 27
- 3 min read
Starting school can stir up a whirlwind of feelings for young children, often including anxiety and fear. As parents, watching our little ones struggle can be heart-wrenching. Abigail, a mother of a 7 year old child, reached out with a heartfelt plea for guidance on how to help her child build confidence before stepping into the classroom.
Abigail's Letter to Jessie
Dear Jessie,
Lately, I've noticed that my 7 year old seems anxious every morning before school. It breaks my heart to see them struggling with these feelings.
They often express fears about what to expect at school, and sometimes they even won’t get out of the car when we arrive. I want to find ways to make this easier for them. I'd love to hear any tips or strategies you might have to help boost their confidence before school.
Abigail
Understanding Childhood Anxiety
Abigail's situation is very common. Many children experience anxiety before school. This fear often stems from uncertainty. Will I be able to do the work? Will my friends play with me? Will I be able to open my lunchbox? Recognising that anxiety is a normal response can help parents manage these fears.
As parents, you should listen to your child and be patient. It's important to address their worries directly.
Open Communication
Acknowledge their feelings is a vital part of helping children tackle their fears. Encourage your child to share their thoughts about school. Ask questions like, “What scares you the most about going to school?” or “How do you feel when you think about making new friends?”
Create a safe space for your child to express themselves. Let them know it’s okay to feel anxious and that they have your support. Simply knowing they can talk may ease their worries and foster resilience.
Creating a Comfortable Routine
A consistent morning routine can help children feel secure about their day. Having a visual timetable for your child to understand how the day will progress is even better. Here’s a simple morning routine that you might find helpful:
Wake-Up Time: Set a specific time for waking up every day, creating predictability.
Breakfast: Offer a balanced breakfast. Involve your child in making breakfast. This simple act of control can empower them.
Transition Activity: Choose an enjoyable activity before heading out, like listening to cheerful music or reading a short story together.
Visual Schedule: Create a visual guide of the morning activities. This can help clarify what to expect and reduce uncertainty. Using stickers or drawings can make it engaging!
Role-Playing Scenarios
To reduce fear of the unknown, role-playing can be a fun and effective strategy. For example, you could act out scenarios such as asking a teacher for help, inviting a classmate to play, or figuring out what to do if they feel lost.
This not only familiarises your child with social situations but also encourages them to think on their feet. Plus, spending quality time together makes this an enjoyable bonding activity.
Encourage Social Connections
Building social ties can mitigate anxiety. Arrange playdates with classmates before school starts or carpool with a friend. Starting school is often easier when you know someone who will be there. Even casual gatherings can foster connections and build a support network.
If you can't organise playdates, consider attending school events together. Getting involved with the school community can also help your child feel more integrated.
Teaching Coping Strategies
Teaching your child practical coping strategies will empower them to manage their anxiety. Here are some effective techniques:
Deep Breathing: Teach your child how to take slow, deep breaths. Practicing this technique can help calm nerves when feelings of anxiety arise.
Positive Affirmations: Work together to create a list of affirmations like “I am strong” or “I can handle this.” Encourage them to say these out loud before school.
Mindfulness Techniques: Introduce mindfulness exercises, such as observing their surroundings or counting their breaths. These simple techniques can help center their thoughts.
Final Thoughts
Abigail, the journey of supporting your child through school anxiety requires patience and understanding. By creating a consistent routine, fostering friendships, and teaching coping strategies, you can help your child feel more confident and secure in their school environment.
Remember, it’s perfectly okay for children to experience anxiety at times. Your love and support will guide them to navigate these feelings and embrace their school experiences. Don’t hesitate to flag this with your child’s teacher because they may have some lovely strategies to help your child cope in the morning at drop off too.
Monitor progress and be open to seeking professional help if needed. With time and encouragement, you will both witness great strides in their confidence.
Take each day as it comes, and you'll witness the positive changes!
Jessie 💖
If you have any parenting questions that need answering, feel free to email Jessie for assistance.
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